"Heaven, heaven....waiting there for me..."
I love that song sung by Hayley Westenra. If I had to pick a singing voice, I'd pick that one.
Matt and I were talking about heaven tonight. When I was little, the thought of heaven actually scared me to death. I remember very well mom explaining how we wouldn't be anything like we are now, and would live in heaven for eternity- in other words, forever and ever and ever and ever and ever.....I thought she was joking at first. You mean we won't come back here on earth? There won't be "time" there? What does forever and ever feel like? It scared me! This faceless unknown that was so mystical and ethereal. I knew nothing but earth. This is all I've ever known. How could we not live here still?
But now...thinking about it now....heaven will be amazing, and I'm actually quite excited. We will be perfect, sinless creatures. There won't be any pain. He will wipe all tears from our eyes. It will be beautiful and all about Him. It will be forever, with Him, so it doesn't matter if I don't know what it will be like. There's nothing to fear because it will be perfection. The childish fear of the unknown that I used to have has left, and in it's place is nothing but curiosity and....a complete feeling of utter worthlessness and joy to think that God will let me live with Him forever. I don't deserve it at all. How amazing is that? It makes me think, what are we doing for Him here, when we will be there, in that perfection, for always? We're pretty sorry creatures. But oh, He is a gracious God!
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The girls in my Sunday School class and I were discussing this on Sunday. I was telling them that I used to think about Heaven until my head hurt and I literally had to force myself to stop thinking about it. Then we were discussing how long forever really is.
ReplyDeleteFunny thing, though. I rarely even consider the "forever" part of it as being so long. I mostly just think about the awesomeness of it all. Maybe it's an old-age thing?
I don't know why the "forever" part of it strikes me so much. Maybe because I am so wrapped up on "time" on this earth. Every day I have something going on, a schedule to keep to, time to try to abide by....I'm so conscience of it. I wish I weren't just a little bit. That I could "stop and smell the roses" more. But I'm starting to realize that heaven won't have "time", and I won't even think about it when I'm there!
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